Oh, just you wait.

Don’t you just love it when someone comes over and judges you in broad daylight and then pretends they’re not really judging you?  Oh yeah, I love that. As if I don’t have enough crap rolling around in my head and now I need to add a heap of veiled criticism to the pile.  

We have these friends, you see, who have a kid whose not quite old enough to be destroying their house yet.  You know, the age right before all hell breaks loose?  Our 16-month-old boy whom we refer to either as  “Bam Bam” or even more often “El Destructo” is definitely at the age where all hell is breaking loose at all times.  
So on a recent visit, said friend saw the massive amount of toys I have strewn all over my living room floor and said all self-righteous and sh#t, “Have you ever thought of keeping the toys in your kids’ rooms?”  
What a brilliant friggin’ idea.
I guess I’m dumber than I look. 
Thank. You. Kind. Friend.
But of course I stood all calm and yet astounded at the same time. 
And I quietly said through clenched teeth and forced smile, “Oh yes, we’ve tried that.”
Oh yeah, I’ve TRIED that.  Just like I’ve tried to get in the shower before noon, put make-up on at least twice a week, not let six hundreds pounds of laundry pile up, keep groceries in my fridge, not yell at my kids, expand my dinner menu beyond pb & j’s, and have a smile on my face when my man gets home from work!!
I’ve tried so hard at all of those things and I think the trying will never end.  
So yeah, dear friend, I’ve tried to keep those toys all organized and tucked into bins in my kids’ rooms.  But as they say you gotta pick your battles and with the war that rages daily around this household, this is one battle I will admit I have lost.   
And dear friend, maybe when you have more than one kid who barely walks, maybe when you have three imaginative, lunatic children who move from toy to toy and place to place faster than you can say “I give up”, then maybe, just maybe, you’ll come over and see my living room that is an ocean of toys and instead of giving me the wisest friggin’ idea I’ve ever heard, you’ll simply nod your head in understanding and we’ll sit on the deck and have a drink.
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