Night Terrors Are Freaky
I don’t know what took me so long to actually sit down and google “night terrors.” But I guess tonight’s episode did it. Phoebes, my now 6-year-old wildflower, has been having night terrors on and off since she was about four but I have never really sat down to read about them. But tonight’s terror was a real doozy so it inspired me to run right over to the computer and figure out what the hell was going on.
They most always start the same way – these night terrors that invade our peaceful evenings. The moan starts and quickly escalates into a crying scream. The sobs are always louder and more panicked than a normal cry and when I realize that the terror is not going away quickly, I usually peek into her room and see her standing on her bed facing the wall. She is usually saying all kinds of crazy things that are mainly incoherent but tonight I heard something very clearly.
Out of the screaming mumbo jumbo, when I thought she saw me coming towards her to comfort her, I heard, “NOOOOOOOO! I want MY mommy!!!!” And when I continued towards her to try and wrap her up in a comforting hug, she sobbed and screamed and ran away from me.
That was a pretty freaky feeling. Having my kid look right at me (or so it seemed) and scream that basically I’m not her mom.
She ran out of her room and literally made a couple laps around our living room screaming, crying and stopping occasionally to raise her arms in the air and let out a even more blood-curdling scream. I picked her up several times to try and comfort her with my voice but she would have none of it. It was such an adrenalin-inducing experience for me. My heart was racing and yet I felt so helpless. To have my daughter state with such fearful conviction that I was not her mommy.
And while often times, googling a condition can get me into a worse frame of mind, this time it helped. I read some articles that described Phoebe’s behavior to a T.
I learned that night terrors:
• are worse than nightmares because you usually can’t wake the kid up during a night terror
• often happen in the earlier part of the night (so true) because the kid is transitioning from one kind of sleep to another at that time in the night
• often involve all kind of panicked screaming
• usually result in the kid not remembering ANYTHING!
• can sometimes be stopped if you wake up the kid right before the time they usually have their night terrors. (This helps to break up the sleep pattern.)
• last between 5-30 minutes.
• are way more traumatic for the parent than the child. (Isn’t THAT the truth?)
I also learned that I shouldn’t talk too loudly or firmly to try and jar her out of it. I should just pick her up, comfort her quietly and lay her back to sleep.
So although tonight’s terror was super freaky, I feel better after my successful google session. What can YOU tell me about night terrors?
14 Responses to “Night Terrors Are Freaky”
Leave a Reply
Moms without Blogs is basically me, Lee, who wonders every single day how in the hell am I going to find the time to write a blog post? I\'m a mom to three kids (ages 9, 7, and 4) who are insanely gorgeous, insanely active, insanely demanding, insanely life-affirming and who have almost driven me insane. In good and bad ways. I work as a producer in reality television, I fold all kinds of laundry, I am picky about how my dishwasher is loaded, I yell entirely too much at my kids, I like desert skies and how my skin feels after a dip in the ocean, I married my soul mate even though I don\'t believe in soul mates really, I believe that laughing \'til it hurts is where it\'s at, I\'m a sucker for putting little treats into the bowls of our three dogs each night, I love driving my 1974 orange convertible Karmann Ghia, I write when inspiration strikes, and summer is my season. And if you\'re a mom without a blog, literally or figuratively, then I\'d probably like to hang out with you. Thanks for reading.
- Karen Duggan: That was one powerful post, there mama! I love the 7-year o...
- Lisa Rae @ smacksy: You, you are fantastic....
- OHmommy: My daughter is receiving the Sacrament of Reconciliation in ...
- Beth at Five Kids Is A Lot Of Kids: Sometimes during the course of our day, we get to read thing...
- katie: Amazing ... you manage to sum it all up! Well done. xx...
- christine: Wow. I love this post. I love how you wrote it. I love th...
LOOK AT THESE COOL SOCIAL MEDIA BUTTONS
ALL THE RAGE
My Labor of Love
People I Dig
LOS ANGELES LISTENED
MIND-BLOWING EPIC-NESS
So sorry to hear about that. I have heard about night terror but don’t have much knowledge. Praying that you will find some really useful information to help her..
Thank you so much for this kind comment.
Hope all is well with you. Lee
Oh Lee… I’m so sorry. Those are terrifying. Paige is starting to go through similar things (never to the extent that you described) but none the less it’s scary. To not be able to help them through it is terrifying
Hang in there…
Thank you! Well, they all have been relatively mild before this one. I’m hoping they return to mild. Hope all is well with you…. Lee
I actually have googled “night terrors” myself about a year ago. Franco was 5 and relentlessly he would wake in the evening screaming bloody murder. He never got out of bed but always looked very disoriented and speaking things that did not make sense. I would always lay him back down and he would be fine. Thankfully – it’s been a long time since his last. Perhaps Phoebe will outgrow hers soon too!
They are so incredibly scary. there is nothing logical about them. You are just watching it unfold, waiting for their heads to spin around. My middle son had them a few months ago, knock on wood, they have lessened.
But, I remember being particularly freaked out by them one night, jumping on twitter, and having over forty parents know EXACTLY what I was dealing with.
I really hope they taper off for you, and if not, give a holler online, we’ll distract you:)
Thanks for this. Good to know I’m not alone. As always. Hope all is well with you….school started for my girls today. Wow. Summer is really over.
Lee
lordy.
only thing i can tell ya about night terrors is thank goodness this didn’t happen at our sleepover!
poor phoebes. : (
Golden Boy has had night terrors for about 11 years. They finally started subsiding LAST YEAR. We need to chat. FOR SURE.
it’s been a hell of a ride.
OMG Lee – this sounds like true terror to your heart. She doesn’t remember anything about this after it happens?? Wow. Sorry little Phoebes. Hopefully it is true that its worse for you, even tho I don’t wish that kind of episode on anyone.
Give her an extra hug from me.
I wish I were a stranger to night terrors, but no. My youngest has them, and it’s exactly as you describe. So horrible. The way he doesn’t recognize us…the way the sight of us doesn’t fix things like it should…that’s what’s terrifying to me.
I know. So freaky. Sorry to hear you’re dealing with them too. Hers have been pretty consistent. Almost every night since she started school. But thankfully on the mild side since this one huge one I wrote about. I’m thinking of trying to wake her right before she usually has them to see if I can break the pattern, you know? Have you tried that?
I tried that, and it does help. I was told to wake him after about 2 hours of sleep…before the terrors start (before I go to bed myself) and make him get up and go to the bathroom, get a drink of water, thoroughly wake up. Then he goes back to sleep and usually makes it through. It’s all about breaking the REM cycle and such.
My younger son used to have these. It’s true they are very traumatic for parents! The crying and screaming sometimes writhing in pain was horrible. Even worse was the time he seemed to wake up, yet looked at us with completely empty eyes, there was no recognition or anything. Completely freaky!
That said, we noticed the night terrors were most likely to happen when he was overtired,so we tried to avoid that.
And the good news is they are now a distant memory. He grew out of them a few years ago.